Let go of that handy man & find peace of mind
Are you ready to leave the pain behind, are you ready to leave the dramatic relationship behind, are you ready to leave that “handyman” behind?
Oh I know about having a handyman. You don't know what a handyman is? A handyman is someone who you really don't want to deal with but you keep them just close enough in case you need some money, a friend to go with you somewhere or when you are wanting sex. I know all about being and having a handyman. You have to be willing to let that person go, period, end of story, no room for discussion.
Whether you move ahead and stay living in the pain is a choice that you must make for yourself. As much as we would like someone else to do it for us, that just isn't how it works. Knowing you have a choice to let go of past hurt is actually very empowering.
When you are stuck in victim mode you often feel like you lack control over the situation, but knowing you can choose to release the pain will move you into survivor mode and the survivor mind frame. That is your ego telling you that you can’t. You can't do better, you can't have better and you can't be better. I call bs on your ego!! Your ego can be a lying asshole.
Have you ever known a person that you know they were lying simply because their lips are moving. They couldn't tell the truth to save their life? Yeah that is your ego. You have to tell your ego to shut the hell up and sit down because they don't have a horse in your race anymore.
One thing you have to realize is you can't just snap your finger and wish your past away or materialize your happy future simply by creating a vision board or writing it down. If you don't put in the work needed to release your past or attract your future then you will just be sitting there looking like Forrest Gump waiting all day on the pillar for Little Forest to get home.
While you are waiting, cut the grass, go unpack that hurt you have been carrying, go work on yourself for a while. Before you know it your bus will show up and bring you the joy you’ve been waiting for. Facing your fears. I know it is hard to not think about the past, that’s like asking a dog not to bark. When your past starts creeping in you are going to gently acknowledge that moment, you are going to tell your present self that memory has no place in the here and now. You have to make the choice to chase it away. When someone else from your past tries luring you back into the darkness you can kindly say, “That was the past, and now I am focusing my life on my future happiness.” People will try to pull you back down and into the drama. I want you to remember, if you crowd your head and life with hurt feelings there is little room for anything positive to come in.
We stay going down that same path, around that same mountain because we haven’t learned the lesson. Here’s a tip… When you are going through something or find yourself repeating the same thing over and over again, stop and ask God “What are you trying to teach me here?” Get it done with as soon as possible All relationships good or bad, reflect what is going on inside each of us. If you feel unworthy of happiness or respect or you keep finding partners that treat you poorly it’s because you don't accept yourself or your worth. You haven't unpacked past limiting beliefs. Once you have learned this you will no longer accept or settle for a relationship you know isn’t right for you.
There is a saying: “rejection is God’s protection.” Not everyone who comes into your life is supposed to remain in it. People are here for a season, a reason, or a lifetime. Give yourself a weekend or a few days to just sit in your feelings. Be angry, be hurt, cry, cuss. These are all ok. You need to decide if you would like someone, like a friend or close family member with you. If you do I need you to tell them “look this is what this time is about (sitting in your feelings), I need you here for support not for judgement or anything else, just your support.” You also have the right that if they start being judge Judy that you can ask them to leave. Give yourself permission to do that.
Are you ready to stop wishing and start living that wish? Are you ready to unpack your past so you can have what you really want? Good, then let's talk.